On Love

What is love? In a world where love is portrayed as anything but what it truly is, it is essential to have this question answered. May we be Christians who are confident in the answer, as we shock the world with a beautiful, unfathomable love.

Love is patient. Love is not quick to become angry, annoyed, or frustrated with others. Love is therefore calm, and not easily flustered. It is long suffering and fore-bearing. It does not change when circumstances change nor is it based on how others treat you. It is constant.

Love is kind. Love is not quick to point out your faults in public or embarrass you in front of others. It is gentle and soft, not loud or invasive. It takes note of the concerns of others and is gracious. Kind love is hospitable, warm, friendly, affectionate, tender, sympathetic and understanding.

Love does not envy. Love is not constantly looking around and comparing what it has to what others have. It is not discontent, thinking it needs more to be happy. It is not bitter or grumpy, nor is it constantly grumbling. It is content and confident.

Love is not boastful. Love is not excessively loud, flashy or rude. It does not lord itself over others, nor does it mock and gloat. It does not brag, nor does it demand recognition. Love does not point out weakness and mock it, but finds way to help and encourage. It is selfless, eager to put others first.

Love is not proud. Love is not arrogant and unpleasant. It does not force its preferences and opinions on others. Love is approachable, and does not act defensive or offensive. It is humble, meek and respectful.

Love does not dishonour others. Love is not constantly seeking ways to disgrace others or reveal their failures. It is respectful towards others. It does not gossip or slander others behind their backs. Love does not seek the most important seat, but is quick to honour and praise others.

Love is not selfish. Love is not manipulative or self-seeking. It is not constantly looking for ways to get something out of someone or cheat them out of something. Love is not absorbed with self, nor is it self centred. It is selfless and generous with its time, resources and money.

Love is slow to anger. Love does not fly off the handle whenever someone does something wrong or annoying. It is constant and even tempered. It is not quick to wrath, nor does it lash out at others. It is not defined by a hot temper, but is calm, peace-seeking and soft.

Love keeps no record of wrongs. It is not quick to seek revenge, nor does it hold a grudge against others. It is not hostile or vindictive. It is quick to forgive and show mercy. It thinks the best of people, and does not keep a long list of past offences to use as leverage in disagreements.

Love does not delight in evil. Love is grieved when it sees sin. It does not find joy in sin, nor does it rejoice when others fall into it. It is not like the people in Psalm 70 who shout “Aha!” whenever someone slips, but is quick to come to their aid. It does not rejoice in shameful things, nor does it find joy in repeating them to others. It finds sin disgusting, and does everything in its power to be free from it. Therefore, love is not corrupt but pure.

Love rejoices with the truth. Love loves the truth, and seeks truth in all things. Truth drives love. It always seeks to do the right thing. It is quick to show mercy and grace. It is not harsh or hard, but compassionate and gentle. Love seeks to show the glory of Christ in all things, and to make the gospel beautiful in everything.

Love always protects. Love defends well. It looks after those who are in its care, guarding their hearts. It does not make fun of people nor does it mock them. It does not reveal the failures and weakness of others and laugh at them. It is ready and willing to fight. It does not let go easily. It covers shame and does not use those weaknesses or failures as a way to manipulate others.

Love always trusts. Love does not change when others do. It is not suspicious or sceptical. When someone betrays trust, love does not hold it against them. It does not say, “Well I forgive you, but don’t expect me to trust you ever again.”. It goes in fully, even if that means being hurt again and again. It is not blind, but it is not vindictive. Love does not make itself the judge over anyone, but forgives quickly.

Love always hopes. Love is hope-filled and fills others with hope. It sees the best in even the worst situations. It is not quick to become gloomy or depressed. There is always hope, even in the darkest circumstances. It is expectant, joyful and alive. It rejoices when it sees others growing spiritually, and it eagerly seeks the salvation of others even when that salvation does not seem remotely possible. Love does not see failure as the final end, but trusts in the goodness of God in all circumstances.

Love always perseveres. Love endures through every situation. It never reaches a point where it says, “This is too much, I cannot be expected to love this person in this situation.”. There is never a legitimate reason to stop showing love. It is never-ending. Love continues through the muck, the darkness, the loneliness, the rejection, and the hurt. It fights for what is right. It does not sit on the fence but is all in, regardless of what happens. It holds on tightly, not losing its grip when life gets hard. It sets down its anchor and weathers every storm with unwavering commitment. It is fierce, faithful, and loyal to death. The definition of such love, one that perseveres and endures, is perfectly summed up in Song of Songs 8:6-7:

“For love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away. If one were to give all the wealth of one’s house for love, it would be utterly scorned.”

Love truly is a beautiful thing, even though it is hard. However, it becomes far more beautiful when we realise that the only One who has loved to this degree, so fully and perfectly, is God Himself. May you be encouraged by the deep, eternal, unshakeable, all-surrounding love of Jesus Christ. Love that led Him to the cross for sinners like you and me. Love that will not let you go, but that will fight for you to the death.